Sunday, October 23, 2005
So i'm stood at the bar at the highbury garage. And i feel at home. As much as i indulge in music from outside my bubble, it's always the indie kid inside me that calls the shots. Or in this case pints. Anyway, tonight has been quite marvellous. And now i return to the dancefloor, laden with pints of krone. Wish me luck!
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
1. Happy Mondays - 'Dennis & Lois'
2. Yello Magic Orchestra - 'Behind The Mask'
3. Nightwatch at the Electric Cinema on Portobello Road
4. Stevie Wonder - 'Big Brother'
5. Neighbours 20th Anniversary show, on mute at work
6. Carter USM - 'The Only Living Boy In New Cross'
7. The Whispers - 'The Beat Goes On'
8. Afrika Bambataa And The Soulsonic Force - 'Planet Rock'
9. Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back on my PS2 in my bunker
10. Nu Yorican Soul - 'I Am The Black Gold Of The Sun'
11. Cocteau Twins - 'Plain Tiger'
12. John Lennon - 'Instant Karma!"
13. Underworld - 'Cowgirl (Deep Dish Remix)'
14. UNKLE Feat. Richard Ashcroft - 'Lonely Soul'
15. I Am Weasel, all over London on my IRiver
I think I'm going to go to bed now and get up early to go to the gym. Right after I've booked my flight on Airswine. Gnight....
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
You Are The Sunshine Of My Life
Instant Karma's gonna get me...
I rarely do train of thought posts here, but this is one of those nights, so you might have to bear with me. I've slipped a very battered copy of Stevie Wonder's Talking Book LP onto my record player (for some reason it just sounds better than my pristine CD copy) and slipped into one of those comfortably melacholic moods I like so much. That's one of the things about living alone. As much as it affords you complete privacy and peace and quiet, once you get home in a certain mood, you're more or less trapped there, without someone to shake you out of it.
What's playing on my mind... I don't know. Hmmm. I feel like my understanding of my place in the world is sharper than it's ever been before, but I'm not sure if that's such a good thing. It's all about growing up I suppose. Lots of people talk about the mid-twenties crisis, and I quietly mocked from afar. You've got to be kidding, right? Mid-twenties? But now... Here I am, sat here, 25 years and 10 months on the clock, and I'm starting to feel it... And more than that, I see it reflected in the faces of my friends and echoed in their words. There's something about your mid twenties. You come flying out of training or university or whatever with a lust for life. You dive into your first job, and even the odd set back like getting sacked can't stop your momentum. But eventually the momentum runs out, inertia kicks in, and you find yourself sat where i am now, looking around, wondering quite what happened.
What's wrong? Well, nothing really. Work is cool. Hard work, but that's not a problem. Ok, so I'm single, which is more of a drag than a genuine crisis. I love my flat. I have loads of cool friends who keep me sane. I'm earning enough to be able to live beyond my means and not panic too much about it. But... That's it. There it is, right back there. "But". Why is there a "But"? Why is there anxiety and doubt? Is it because we're all looking around wondering if this is quite where we expected to end up? Is this it? Did we want more? Or is this just supposed to feel different? It could be the whole "Do I really want to do this for the rest of my life?" What exactly are we doing this all for? The pursuit of wealth, the ideal family unit, kids smiling in back seat?
Those like me who are single are just starting to feel the gentle ticking of time... whereas those attached who are unmarried can hear wedding bells floating somewhere distantly on the wind. Society's expectations start to weigh more heavily on the shoulders. What little beauty we possess is being eroded by the lines of time. Our childhood dreams are starting to look less and less feasible, as we wonder why we ever wanted such things so much anyway? With a culture that feeds us nothing but visions of a celebrity life in paradise, and promises us we can all make it, that we're all special, that if you want enough it can be yours, is this the stage we realise it's all bullshit? Are we the same as the bitter and deluded tone deaf kids dismissed by Simon Cowell, who turn back and spout words promising that you'll be back, you'll make it in the end? We can't all be successful. We can't all make it. It's a lie.
Is the best we can expect a life as slaves to the wage, living as little people in little houses, breeding kids even more obsessed with success and celebrity vacuity than we are, slowly watching our friends die around us until the reaper comes to free us from this mortal coil?
No. No. No. I demand a reassessment of success. A rejection of what we're told. A life centred on love and expression and fun and art and beauty and freedom. Of being nice to each other, of making the best of it, rather than declaring the world's going to hell and sitting back and letting it. Money for living rather than living for money. Yes. I think I talked myself into a better mood. Thanks for listening.
Sunday, October 16, 2005
I Against I
"If you can't some something nice, don't say anything at all"
And such is my philosophy towards this place. I apologise for the lack of posts of late, but I feared that I didn't have much to say that was fun. I'm ok. Really. Just had a busy, mad, exhausting couple of weeks, with stress and bother. I'm only referring to it now by way of explanation, as there's nothing worse than a blog of self indulgent moaning about one's lot in life. As my dad would say, "There's kids starving in Africa. Now finish your brocolli!"
Away from the dull weight of life crushing my spirit, there's been some cool stuff too! DJing at one of London's most exclusive (read: expensive) nightspots. For about 15 minutes! Helping out on the very first Peel Day, which was a huge honour. And I've also filled that whole in my soul left by the absence of religion with plenty of material purchases, be they records, comic books, clothes or classic movies on DVD. Only last night I managed 1 pub gathering, 2 houseparties and falling asleep on the nightbus, having to use the emergency exit button to get out. I wandered round Trafalgar Square at 4am, a little confused and disorientated, in a pensive mood, surveying the statues.
And today I have been obscenely hungover. I still have the shakes as i write this now. Mum's roast lunch did help, but it's one of those things that you just have to grin and bear. I've been filling myself with chocolate and smoothies (one cancels out the other, right?) as some form of antidote, but it's not working. Oh well.
And the trip home to see the folks today for my Dad's birthday has inspired me. My Dad, who's always, shall we say, enjoyed his food, has gone a diet after feeling a bit ropey and going to the doctors. He's ok, but he needs to lose weight. And fair play to the man, he chucked out all the sweets and fizzy drinks and savoury snacks. He's lost over a stone in 5 weeks since I last saw him, and he looks loads better already. His clothes are falling off him, and he seems a much more relaxed and happy person. So... I come home and look in the mirror and think "I could have some of that." I know I've proclaimed fitness vows on here before, but now I've a point to prove, and a genuine inspiration. Whilst I'm not exactly a super fatso myself, I've certainly inherited his sweet tooth, and could stand to lose a few pounds. So I think I'm gonna follow his example. Wish me luck. With my lack of willpower, I'm going to need it...
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Keep It Fucking Peel
Thursday, October 06, 2005
She Bangs The Drums
1. Logistics - 'The Trip'
2. The Prodigy - 'Voodoo People (Pendulum Remix)'
3. The Ganja Kru - 'New Frontiers'
4. Clipz - 'Soundboy'
5. Calibre - 'Drop It Down'
6. Slam - 'Positive Education' (Not Dnb at all, but still very nice)
7. Ed Rush & Nico - 'Proton'
8. Shy FX & T Power - 'Feelings'
9. Nu Yorican Soul - 'Its Alright I Feel It (Roni Size remix)'
10. Krust Feat Saul Williams - 'Coded Language'
11. Radiohead - 'Street Spirit (Fade Out)' (Well, I needed a change!)
If you're vaguely interested, you can probably find samples of the more recent tracks at www.breakbeat.co.uk, the home of all things DnB. If not, then I'll try and write something witty tomorrow. No promises though!
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
Lost In The Supermarket
I love supermarket shopping.
I always have, since I was a kid. There's something about these huge cathedrals of commerce that pleases far more than shopping malls do. I must confess to always being more of a middle of the road Sainsbury's or Tesco man, finding the cut priced warehouses of Asda and Lidl a bit, well, depressing, and the upmarket bourgeois quality of Waitrose and Marks n Sparks food halls a bit rich for my tastes.
I used to help my mum by pushing the trolley as soon as I was tall enough, not out of some misplaced desire to help her out, but more because I just love the places. But it was at University that I realised the real wonder of the places, because then I was free! The apronstrings had been ripped asunder, and I was free to jump on my trolley to freedom. Cos now I could buy everything I wanted, and Mum couldn't tell me off! Except of course... I was a student. So I was trapped by having to preserve enough cash to pickle myself in the evening. Curses! But still there was room for trips to the forbidden aisle, where the evil treats resided and called me from beyond the petrol station forecourt outside. And during the holidays back home, there was, at the time, the biggest Tesco in the country, with 24 hour shopping that would find my friends and I buying daft things like a chocolate gateau, a lettuce and a copy of Smash Hits at 3am, whilst insisting on all 6 of us having a trolley each.
And now, here i am, a fully certified adult, with a job, a regular paycheque, and 2 supermarkets within walking distance of the Bandito Bunker, one of them even boasting 24 hour opening and bizarre "ethnic" treats from across the globe. So, I'll find any excuse to slip my coat on, grab my wallet, and worship at the gates of la supermarche, as our French cousins would say. And then I'll skip and bound round the aisles, my modest basket overflowing with treats from all over the world, caring not a jot for the damage carrying such a heigh is doing to the lumber part of my back.
And yes, I do feel a certain level of resentmentment that my bananas are better travelled than I am. And yes, I know that my cheap CD is no doubt killing real record shops (not that I don't do my bit, I might add). And yes, I'm sure the store is actively stifling local business. But forgive me. The supermarket is one of the vices of the modern age that I would genuinely struggle without. So, I beg you, forgive me, my No Logo bearing friends. I had to start it somewhere.
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Those of you who follow this regularly (yes, both of you), will know that i take my comedy very seriously.
As such, today has been a sad day, having heard of the death of a British comedy great, Ronnie Barker. My own personal tribute is to say that my memories of The Two Ronnies, Open All Hours and Porridge (which he thought was his best work, and I heartily agree) are of sitting at home, with my family, and laughing and laughing and laughing. His work is a part of my childhood and growing up, and having just watched the tribute on BBC 1, his gift for acting and comedy hasn't dimmed a bit in the years since. Wonderful stuff. A sad loss.